Three lessons learned from a fail
A mildly embarrassing story
Did I ever tell you the story of getting my first ever invite to guest on a podcast (yay!).... and why it never happened? No? Have a seat...
In case you don't know much about me already let me give you a bit of context. I started my business around April 2019 and it's naturally taken me a little while to feel bedded in with what I'm doing and where my value lies. Some people might call me a procrastinator. I don't agree, but I do like to take my time. Right now, it's 3pm on my only child-free day this week and I'm still in pyjamas.
It's what we self-employed folk all want, isn't it? To get to the point in our businesses when the offers start rolling in? Without having to do a thing for it? The dream. I’m all over it. Except, after the experience I'm about to share, I'm not, because it did not work out in my favour. It's actually kind of an embarrassing story. But you know, vulnerability…
Photo by CHUTTERSNAP on Unsplash
This person who shall remain nameless reached out to me to guest on their podcast.
“Great”, I thought. “I need to start doing this....” I've been talking about pitching for podcasts for ages. I must have "manifested" this opportunity (manifesting is making a vague statement, taking no action and hoping for the best, right?)
I jumped at the chance, despite the fact I'd never engaged with this person at all and neither had they with me. Glaring red flag number 1!
We arranged a time and date and they sent me over some questions they wanted to cover. All good.
Glaring red flag number 2: I briefly attempted to listen to their podcast and didn't want to at all. Then when I forced myself to, I was bored and gave up incredibly quickly.
Glaring red flag number 3: I spied their social media was noticeably missing any visible diversity despite the extremely regular podcast guests and this bothered me, but I ignored my conscience.
The day before the recording was due to happen, the host needed to reschedule.
No problem, I'm flexible. We rescheduled.
The week before the new date arrived, the host needed to reschedule.... Sure. I'm easy.
And again.
Being the accommodating "good girl" I am, I was flexible. Again.
This happened more times than I'd like to admit. Maybe four or five times in total. For various fully plausible reasons. Before I finally got it - the blindingly obvious message that this was not meant to be. This person had no respect for me, my work or my time.
Quite frankly, I was on the train to hate-ville. Even if we finally had got to record, the chances of me launching into a passive aggressive tirade were high.
I did the grown up thing. I told them politely, but directly that I was out. Like Duncan Bannatyne.
And you know what happened, dear reader?
Nothing. I wish I could tell you that an incredible offer came rolling straight in to replace it from some podcasting A-lister or other, but that's not quite happened yet.
Here are the valuable lessons I learned:
Pay close attention to those red flags and listen to your inner Jiminy Cricket
Being clear on your own values isn't enough - ensure yours align with potential collaborators
And finally, as with everything, you've got to put yourself out there and take action towards what it is you want
Since when did sitting around waiting for opportunities to fall into your lap ever work out for anyone? (Though, if you have examples when it did, please send them my way because I'm still eager for this fairy tale to be true).
Finding the lessons in each experience, especially the less-than-fun ones can be a good way to dust yourself off when you’re down and get back in the saddle. If you’d like help building this habit, coaching could help.
